I was the Happiness Salesman
People who know me know that I am a really passionate person -- especially when it comes to people I am close to. Sometimes to the point of sticking my nose where it doesn't belong and pushing my goodwill upon them. I want everyone I care about to be happy and I have always made it my personal mission to try introducing them down a path that will lead to happiness. Help me help you has always been my philosophy.
Is my definition of happiness their definition of happiness? Maybe not. I hadn't thought of that...until recently.
Up until recently, I've had this persistent notion that people inherently want to improve themselves and build a better life mentally and otherwise.
In theory they do, but they won't do it by my hand. If they want it, they'll do it on their own. Without me.
I think some people are just okay with existing and that they live with a vague hope that someday, something will change without them doing anything differently.
Photo source: pixabay.com
All along, I've unknowingly been the pushy salesman that people are one excuse away from dismissing because they're comfortable with being uncomfortable.
No one needs a happiness salesman. No one needs me except me, and that's what has been so difficult for me to accept.
I never could have imagined playing that role of an annoying salesman, but after finding a new sense of clarity, I see what has been so obvious all along. It's been rough for me to realize my mistake of being too hands-on, but I feel I'm finally at a point where I understand and accept reality.
With this powerful realization came the remedy that works for everyone: I've indefinitely stopped offering my unsolicited help.
This realization has freed up a lot of my time. I've begun exploring what it is that makes me happy. I'm appreciating my own life and making myself happy for once, and it's a glorious path I'm leading myself down.
Unrequited love has a way of changing people and that is how it has changed me -- for the better.
Photo source: pixabay.com
the more you care about most of the people and try to force them to be happy, the bigger pile of shit you will get from them.
You know you did it right when you get something like this:
But hey, keep on walking =)
I can't begin to tell you how true that is....................
It's good to realize truths about yourself. But the exact minute it hits you always sucks.
that's how we learn. If the hit itself won't hurt, we'll never learn
Yes, well... we can't have everything now can we? :)
Hey, ya might think about entering this post into this contest. Or maybe another one. I find this post awesome in its honesty.
Sometimes we smother what we love to a point that personal growth for it has stunted. You just have to trust that if help is desperately needed that they will reach out to you in the attempt of help.
I’ve seen people’s lives go down the path of the derailment and they would never ever accept anyone’s help while it was going down. In fact, they took it as “no one wants to see me succeed so I’ll do it in spite of the world” mentality.
Sometimes you have to be there with open loving arms. Other times you slam the door shut because it’s the 4th time and you have had enough.
Glad to hear you are making more time for yourself! You do anything exciting as of late?
Unfortunately, in my case, I can't be there with loving arms because it isn't the right thing to do. :(
Yes, I've been making a ton more time for myself. I've had a cold the past few days, so nothing exciting except trying to catch up on work. Last week (or week before, can't remember now) I invested in my first ICO; that was exciting. :)
How are you faring these days? We should talk in Discord. Friend me there if you have an account. I've been trying to round up all the people I talk to here so that every conversation isn't always in comments. You can find me there by searching cali-girl#6650
Sounds good I have sent a request.
People are about as happy as they choose to be... and no matter what we show them, we cannot make them choose to be any happier than they are. And sometimes they even grow resentful and angry and learning something that could make them happier... perhaps because they are just not in the right "head space" with themselves.
I was never the "Happiness Salesman;" but I have spent most of my life being the "We can all get along!" salesman... mediating and being the diplomat in every conflict, even when it was not mine to be there and intervene. So I get it.
Beautiful and insightful post!
I've seen the anger and resentment firsthand, and I didn't know what to make of it for the longest time. I'm glad I've learned to stop trying to understand and intervene so that I can put my energy into what I'm responsible for -- me.
Do you still feel a need to mediate sometimes or have you completely stopped?
@bearbear613 nominated you for @libertyteeth's contest, so I thought I'd check you out.
Of course, this was your most recent post, and the one I checked first. From the tone of this post I suspect you're going though some realizations and you'll change as a person.
Because of this I'm not going to check out any of your previous posts. Instead I'm going to follow you and maybe someday later check them out, to see how you've changed.
My inner romantic won't allow me to do anything else. That utter bastard.
I'm an ever-evolving person who changes by the day -- by the hour or even minute sometimes. But yes, lately I have expanded more forcefully and rapidly than usual. You can't re-do a first impression, so I appreciate that you want to see me for who I am in the present.
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