Your EX is not your NEXT

I couldn't sleep the other day. I woke up much too early and was trying to go back to sleep, but my mind wasn't having it. I laid in bed just thinking about how some people respond better than others to hurt/betrayal/disappointment/failure/loss.

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Good Help is Hard to Find

I know a woman (let's call her Zelda) who hired a girl to help her with things around the house. Over the time the girl worked there, she stole clothes from Zelda's daughter and stole cash from the house. There were other violations of trust too, but I won't get into that. Still, what impressed me is that after Zelda fired the girl (big surprise!) she hired someone new right away. She didn't keep the bad experience keep her from getting the help she wanted. Not only that, but she went into the new boss/employee relationship in a positive manner! She didn't have negative expectations for the new girl despite her previous bad experience.

Some people deeply understand that "your EX is not your NEXT." The person who is coming next, isn't the person who previously hurt you. Often people will have "bitter root" expectations of others in their future as a result of their past bad experiences.

This doesn't just apply to romantic relationships. Your EX could be starting a business that closed, writing a blog that got 0 viewers per week, or even a parent who told you that you were never good enough. It can apply to working for a company where you're mistreated, overworked, underpaid, or even unfairly fired. Your NEXT shouldn't be judged based on the actions of your EX.

Whatever your EX, your NEXT opportunity is different.

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Elephant Rope

I heard that when a circus acquires a baby elephant, they tie a rope to its leg and stake it to the ground. Because the elephant isn't very big, it can't pull the stake out and can't get away. Over time, the baby elephant will learn that it can't get free. Eventually, the elephant will grow up and become more than large enough to rip up the stake and run away. However, because it has been taught that it couldn't when it was young, it won't even try when it's older. Its experiences from the past are its expectations of the present and future.

Your EX is not your NEXT!
@themanwithnoname

Break Free

This doesn't have to be the case for you. Don't believe those voices or experiences from your past that tell you you're not good enough. Even if those voices are in your present, stop listening to them! You are not your mistakes. You are DEFINITELY not someone else's mistakes.

The people who have hurt you, betrayed you, let you down, or fired you are in the PAST. You can learn lessons and look for warning signs from what you experienced, but those things are in the PAST. If this is ringing true for you and you need to take that next step, say it out loud, "It's in the past."

Even if your start is to "succeed" at Steemit, you can do it! There's is virtually limitless possibility here. You can do it. Maybe you've been writing only one post per week because you're scared. Give up the fear.

It's not always easy. Some wounds go deep. And it might not happen overnight, but start now. Start today. That big stake in the ground that used to hold you back is now just a little stick. Kick it off and live free!

Ono playing Boggle

tl;dr Don't hold people in your present and future accountable for the mistakes of people in your past.

@themanwithnoname

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What's an obstacle you had to overcome to reach where you're at today?

Are there things holding you back that you want to let go?

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Note: Not life advice. For informational/entertainment purposes only. Use wisdom if it's available, common sense if it's not. :) Regardless, be safe and don't willingly put yourself in a position to be hurt. Do your own research. Make your own decisions.