I believe the crux of it is expectations like you say. The first indicator of character we have is of appearance, and image, and whilst it's wrong to place too much emphasis on that, it can often give a few clues as to what they person may actually be like.

A woman who s very overly dressed up may give the impression of someone who is a maybe focused on the superficial from a distance. That might be true. But that person may have an important meeting, be on their way to a date, or simply just really take pride in their appearance.

Similarly with behaviour and mannerisms. If you were to meet someone who doesn't engage with you as enthusiastically as you'd like, you might take the ego centric view that they have a problem with you.

Again, this doesn't take into account where they have 'come from'. They might have just received a piece of terrible news, be depressed or might just plain be having a bad day.

To counteract this, I think the most important thing is to approach all of our interaction from the neutral perspective and place of non-judgment.

First impressions are undeniably important, but we shouldn't become to attached them. I have several friends who still think of me the way I was 10 years ago, despite me maturing a great deal.

We need to be flexible in our assumptions, and try not to peg people with an identity we refuse to let them grow out of.

Great question,

Peace.