Crave

sumayyahsaidso (64)in #poetry • 6 years ago (edited)

This poem first appeared on Sumayyah Said So.

crave

cracks forming in the windows
fissures in my soul
open spaces that she tore
brutally inside of me
the emptiness is killing me

tell me she’s the devil
though she’s never minced her words
never lied or sugar-coated
never told me things absurd
out calling her a demon
yet she’s never steered me wrong
never twisted truth’s unholiness
always warned me to be strong
but it’s hard to stand against
a campaign so relentless
in her absence i may fall

chained and holding onto nothing
fear imposed upon my will
lusting after precious sacred time
begging dreams to keep me still
write my story on the wall and try
to figure out a plan
used to hold me in the darkness and
plant kisses on my hand
make me shudder
lose control
tattoo her lip prints on my spine
desire overwhelms my body
floods and clouds my mind
offered her my very life
never have i breathed this way
i’m a hollowed out abomination
a monster you can’t slay

tell me she’s the devil
she’s the goddess in my skin
redemption’s not what carves my path
i am the wings
she is the wind