Let’s talk about emotional sensitivity

in #psychology6 years ago (edited)

Introduction


Everyone of us feel emotions, they are part of our lives and without emotions we would have a harder time bonding with each others and creating positive social relationships with the people we like.

Even though it is natural to feel emotions, not everyone is capable of experiencing the same intensity, and there are people that are like a rock, never expressing anything on the outside but surely feeling something on the inside, and the same happens with others that are overly emotional and cannot stop feeling intense emotions on a constant basis.

However, for some people being overwhelmed by emotions can become something that might affect their daily functioning and even the way they reason, especially if the person is mainly focusing in negative emotions. Which is why it is very important to understand the potential impact our emotional sensitivity can have in our lives, as well as the importance of trying to keep our thoughts on the things that trigger a positive feeling, rather than a negative one.

The influence of our emotional sensitivity


Over sensitivity is the trait that let you become overly affected by an external influence that can hardly affect normal people. For example not being able to tolerate Constructive criticism that other people normally tolerate is a sign of over sensitivity. | Source

People with a high emotional sensitivity are those who can experience emotions, as well as positive and negative feelings intensely. This type of people, rather than being guided by reason, are usually guided by their instinct, which in their case it is highly developed and they use it to make almost all kinds of decisions in their life.

Because they have a good sense of intuition it is easier for them to detect if a person they just met is reliable or not, or if someone is lying to them or not. Perceiving what is happening in their environment is simply something that comes naturally to them.

As our society becomes more automated, the need for workers with intuition, creativity and empathy becomes even greater. The abilities of sensitive people can never be reproduced by technology. | Source

It is easier for them to have a lot of empathy towards other people. By experiencing their own emotions to the fullest, they are more likely to easily identify what happens to others, which helps them in interpreting things from a different perspective and this allows them to naturally develop an emotional connection and to perceive changes in the emotional state of other individuals.

These people value simple things in life that make everyone happy, and they don’t forget to appreciate the opportunity to share valuable moments with their loved ones, to appreciate nature, being able to sleep in a comfortable bed and to have a hot bath, little things a lot of us take for granted because realizing how important they are for our happiness is not something most people tend to do. But a person with a high emotional sensitivity will surely be aware of those little things and feel grateful about it.

They will reflect and internalize their thoughts and emotions since they are very introspective people who tend to think twice about their affairs and analyze each situation in detail in order to reach a good conclusion.

However, processing a lot of sensitive and emotional information at the same time is something they tend to do, and this can end up being overwhelming, making them lose their mental and emotional balance, especially if they are going through an intense situation in their lives.

They are also at a higher risk of burnout, because they get easily overwhelmed. This is why it is critical to know if you are a HSP, so you can seek out relationships and environments that make you shine. | Source

This is why people who are too sensitive might tend to feel quite defenseless and might start to reject themselves because of this and because of the fact they are extremely emotional and cannot control this aspect of their personality. It is true that being extremely sensitive can sometimes bring many difficulties for a person's day to day interactions, so it is necessary for them to learn how to properly manage this, but we must also take into account that anyone can learn how to take advantage of this quality, and find the most positive side out of any circumstance

Challenges of having a high emotional sensitivity


Being a highly sensitive person can certainly make life challenging, but it also lets you see beauty in the world that others cannot see. When you live your life in a way that's right for you and focus on your own unique gifts, the belittling voices will begin to fade. And that's something to feel good about. | Source

When a highly sensitive person does not know how to manage their emotions in a healthy way, it is very likely they will face different types of difficulties that may appear throughout their lives.

They may have the sensation of not fitting in with others due to their quality of being very sensitive. Which in the worst case can lead to the person becoming more and more isolated which complicates the possibility of developing new friendships and relationships, and because they experience positive and negative emotions in a more intense way, they may be too sensitive when dealing with criticism especially if they do not know how to manage it well, and this can end up damaging their self esteem little by little.

Having difficulty establishing limits on others is also something that could happen, because if they are feeling rejected and finding themselves with a deteriorated self esteem, they may be doing their best to try to please others.

Some signs of a person with a high emotional sensitivity are the following:

  • Frequently feels physical symptoms (i.e. stress or headache) when something unpleasant happens during the day
  • Is afraid of rejection, even in relatively minor situations
  • Often hides negative feelings, believing they are too strong, turbulent, embarrassing or vulnerable to share; keeps a lot of negative emotions inside
  • Startles easily at sudden noises, fast traffic, or other unpleasant surprises
  • Often overreacts to real or perceived slights and provocations
  • Finds it difficult, when triggered by relatively small unpleasantness with people, to just “let it go”.| Source

Nevertheless, these people should not feel rejection towards the fact of being a highly sensitive person, the best they can do is accept this is part of their personality and the fact there is nothing wrong with being this way. They will not achieve anything with trying to hide this quality or reject it, on the contrary, the more they do it, the more their sensitivity will increase and they will have a worse time. It is important not to forget that being sensitive is not a disease, it is only a personality trait, every person is different and unique and the best we can do is learn how to live with our qualities, accept them and take advantage of the ones we have as much as possible, only then we would be able to fully enjoy our lives.

Most highly sensitive people are very kind individuals who try to help and be always available to others, which is not bad of course, it is fairly good. However, when people cross the line of generosity and they get to the point of sacrificing themselves for everyone and forgetting about their own needs and goals, it can become a real problem. It is crucial for these people to learn how to set limits to others and keep a healthy balance between taking care of others and taking care of themselves. The worst thing that can be done is for a person to stop taking care of himself and dedicate his energy solely to satisfy others, because this is clearly an unsustainable dynamic.

Because of that, these people should try to make sure their social circle in which they interact on a daily basis consists in positive people and stay away from those individuals who only bring them problems and generate a sense of toxicity. Being surrounded by positive people will always be of huge help to keep ourselves in a healthy state, and this applies especially to sensitive people.

Conclusion


People with high emotional sensitivity are able to experience emotions more intensely and since this applies to both positive and negative emotions, it has its advantages and disadvantages.

They can either be consumed by their negative emotions up to the point their own health starts to be affected, or instead they can make sure to start focusing on experiencing the positive side of life, allowing them to go on with their activities in a more energetic way, and even start to spread that positive energy to others thanks to the intensity with which they feel those emotions.

Therefore, they can be able to help others adopt a positive perspective whenever it is needed.


Do you consider yourself a highly sensitive person? Have you ever know someone that is?


References

2knowmyself – emotional sensitivity

psychologytoday – sensitive person

additudemag - hypersensitivity

psychcentral - highly sensitive person

psychologytoday – signs of sensitive person

forbes – sensitivity and strength

hrzone – highly sensitive people and workplace

psychologytoday – high sensitivity


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This is such an important subject, in hindsight, it clearly explains a lot about the behaviours exhibited by my ex-girlfriend. If I had understood the pros and cons of her personality, probably things would've worked out fine between us.

Having read this post, I believe it will come in handy in dealing with similar personalities, later in the future.

I believe it will come in handy in dealing with similar personalities

Understand our partner's personality can certainly be helpful in keeping the relationship alive after a few months/years.

And well, everyday we learn new things so I am glad this article was helpful for you mate!

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Great read!

Well, I’m more of an idontreallygiveafuck person, but on the positive side I actually give more energy.

From my experience highly sensitive people have beautiful hearts, but I really can’t stand watching a movie with a highly sensitive person; if you know what I mean 😂

highly sensitive people have beautiful hearts

Yep, that's because they have no issues developing empathy :)

but I really can’t stand watching a movie with a highly sensitive person; if you know what I mean

hahahahaha I do get you mate

lol! I’m glad you can relate ;)

I think no two people experience emotions quite the same. They are tied in to our thoughts and memories, and trying to suppress them is usually a losing battle, as you said. You can often work around them though, trying to avoid things that set you off in a negative way

You can often work around them though

That's right, and it can be of great help for anyone who realizes that.

Such a well written and informative post! I know that I am a highly sensitive person and always have to keep my "giving" nature in check. I've lost myself before because of it, but now that I'm found again, I know the signs to watch out for and never plan on walking that path again.

Unfortunately there are people who are takers and are more than happy to take advantage of such kindness. I liked your comment about

Being surrounded by positive people will always be of huge help to keep ourselves in a healthy state, and this applies especially to sensitive people.

Thank you for a great post!

Unfortunately there are people who are takers and are more than happy to take advantage of such kindness

Agree, I have seen that in person and it is really painful seeing that happening over and over to some people.

Thanks for your kind words @lynncoyle1!

Yeah you are right friend. Huhu, I am kinda person who always think negatives rather than positives . Huhuhu

This is so true... I am very sensitive and I stay in my shell always to avoid every negativity that comes with my nature

When a highly sensitive person does not know how to manage their emotions in a healthy way, it is very likely they will face different types of difficulties that may appear throughout their lives..

Am scared now

Am scared now

I don't think you should be because it also has its positive side which I consider much more important.

Sounds almost like a description/another aspect of or phrase for an empath. I DEFINITELY fit this description. I sometimes wish that I could share part of my emotional sensitivity with my husband so he could talk about feelings more! :)

Great informative post!

Well both concepts are really related, and people with a lot of emotional sensitivity will always have a high empathy as well.

Sounds almost like a description/another aspect of or phrase for an empath

haha it is not easy for everyone to openly talk about these subjects.

Thanks for stopping by!

Its quite weird how very little things even influence and get to trigger so many people's sensitivity too. Reactions of people to most situations often bedazzles one, to say the least. But just like you said " the best they can do is accept this is part of their personality and the fact there is nothing wrong with being this way". Nice piece @dedicatedguy

I am glad you like the article @rickie!

They may have the sensation of not fitting in with others due to their quality of being very sensitive

This is pretty much the story of my life. It's probably the best post I've read about it on Steemit (in fact the web) as really describes what I've experienced my whole life. I've always had a heightened sense of empathy and feel emotions quite intensely, which is actually really difficult and resulted, in the end, in a nervous breakdown as I just couldn't handle the pressure at work and started getting really paranoid. Anyway, that' sall a long story - what's helped me really is yoga and meditation, and I wrote a post yestrday about how I feel about my emotions in response to ecotrains question of the week, if you are interested in checking that out.

I found being aware/conscious of what was going in my body really helped, so that I didn't get so swept up in the waves and waves of emotion that could really bring me down.

It took me a long, long, long time to realise that there was nothing wrong with me for being like this - I always felt so different to everyone else because of it, which isn't helped by people saying 'don't be so sensitive!' as if it were somethign I could help.

Hey there @riverflows thanks for stopping by for your kind words mate!

what's helped me really is yoga and meditation

Really good for you to find out these 2 could help you, they are certainly quite common when dealing with issues like the one you are describing.

It took me a long, long, long time to realise that there was nothing wrong with me for being like this

I can only imagine how that would have felt, but I am happy you know have a proper understanding about this.

I will be checking out your post about the question of the week!

Cheers!

You know the sweetest thing is my Dad told me that without my emotional self, our family woukd be so much the worse off. He said that this year after a brutal cancer treatment where he faces death ... a time of reflection i guess (he is okay thank god) .... i was so touched to hear something i wish i had heard years before... i wasnt such an outcast after all!!! Emotional sensitivity can make you feel this way indeed... its quite isolating!

Sometimes it is not easy to freely express our opinion or feelings towards another person. It is not easy to develop that deep emotional connection, even between family members. At least in your case he eventually did tell you the truth about what he think.

Cheers @riverflows!

That's very true. Men in particular find it tough to do that, but it was so nice that Dad did in the end. I did always know he loved me though - i didn't need words for that! xx

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