Am I cheesey? Am I real?

Over the past year and a half interacting online again, I've experimented quite a bit with tone, topic, what state I'm in when I write, and presentation. I experiment to see how I feel and to see how others react.

I would not share something that did not feel like it was me, whether it be a story, a song or a Facebook or Steemit post, but I find "meeting people halfway" a bit difficult sometimes. "Halfway" usually doesn't cut it for most people, they want you to meet them exactly where they are at, feeding into their echo chamber OR they want you to be their savior, a larger than life version of yourself, someone who they could never imagine themselves to be.

To put it short, we are all used to disempowerment, or at least, we are used to fitting into a paradigm of disempowerment.

The average person is full of imperfection, and even when they try to hide it, they can't. We all sound stupid sometimes, unless we constantly censor ourself, which is what those of us in the spotlight, and those with an audience end up doing. This mostly has to do with the fact that everyone wants to appeal to as many people as possible.

I write this because I am also guilty of it. Looking back at my last article, I feel "who is this guy?" I feel everything he is saying, the words are me, but the presentation is not. I'm not Nas fucking Daily. Not bashing on Nas, the content he covers is brilliant, but his presentation is cheesey as hell and I don't presume to know what he is like off camera, but I will guess that h didn't talk like that before he started making YouTube videos.

I respect Nas Daily, but fuck, I never want to be Nas Daily. I do not want to talk a certain way if it does not feel like me, just to make it easier to swallow so it can reach more people. I do not want to be cheesey. I want to be real as fuck.

I think spending time in (what I would call) "New Age" circles also leads one to censor themselves a lot. One wants to be seen as "enlightened" or even just "not a fucking mess" and so we often end up censoring our true feelings. We probably do have our spiritual shit together most of the time but we slip and fall sometimes, and then we try and climb our way back up, slowly over months or even years, always pretending we never fell.

Changing yourself to reach more people is a scarcity mindset in action. Whether it's for more views or more respect in your community. I want no part in it.

I'm not accusing anyone else of doing this, like a said, I don't know Nas Daily, I'd probably like him if I met him, and I prefer a world with Nas Daily doing what he's doing to a world without Nas Daily.

But I am not Nas Daily.