The Doctor just said you're dying in one year | How will you spend it?steemCreated with Sketch.

in #discussion4 years ago (edited)

You got a strange disease that will kill you in exactly one year.

For the next year, you'll remain strong, lucid, healthy and cheerful.

But in exactly 365 days, you will be no more.

How are you spending your last year on earth?

What radical decisions are you making?

What will stay the same? What will be different starting tomorrow?

Are you changing a lot in this last year of life you have?

If so, why haven't you changed already?

Why wait until you only have one year to live?

What's stopping you? Your mind? Your fears? Your routine?




Share with us your take about this on the comment section, I will be giving @ocdb votes to thoughtful, well written comments, especially to those people who share their own thought AND reply/generate discussions in other people's thoughts.

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To start of, in my opinion, this is something that has been lacking from sites like this. Simple, but incredibly intriguing and insightful posts, that detracts away from the majority of similarly mind numbing posts on bitcoin, politics, and anything that makes you feel like a bit of run down, helpless code stuck in an infinity mirror. That being said, let me now express my views on this topic.

So, 365 days to go, before i shall be no more on the planet earth, what do i do to make the most out of the "time" i have? To begin with, i would instantly get married to my partner. I have been with her and her 4 beautiful children for almost 3 years now and it is something that i have been looking to do in the future (when i believed it was the right time in my life to propose) that amazing question. Now, i would need to propose to her of course and a man of my talents and passions, trust me, i would make sure i would do that in style.

How would i do this, you ask? Well, i would book a 3 day wknd trip to the best country manor house i could find. A place full of amazing history, character yet also equal in stunning views with abundance of tranquillity that would engulf us for the whole time we spent there. In terms of the day and time in the day, this is tricky, but, i know i wouldn't do it on the first day as we are just getting to appreciate our surroundings. So that comes to Saturday and its incredibly tempting to arrange it some point in this day. Now, i personally feel the evening would be the best time, but, there's issues with this as (1) i wouldn't want to propose at dinner, that would be too classic for my liking and (2) its too dark to enjoy a sunset, or the beautiful scenery of a lake or stroll through enchanting woods . So, with taking that in to consideration, we would have a lovely spa treatment, enjoy being pampered, relaxing, peaceful morning. We would then explore the depths of the manor houses history and spend a few hours admiring its origin. This would take us to about 2 pm and we would go for lunch, that would be on a beautiful balcony, over looking the incredible views of such luxurious seclusion. This would take us till about 4 pm. Then we would spend a few hours on a fun mini golf course to let our hair down and build up excitement for what is to come. So its now about 6 pm and dinner is approaching us, so, i take us for a lovely stroll through the enchanted woods for about an hour and it comes to a lake, with a boat for two. Its now around 7pm and the sun is setting, we get in and i take the boat to the other side appreciating the wildlife around us. We then walk up a small hill and as we get to the top, there is a hot air baloon waiting for us piloted by a vicar, We get inside and experience the sun setting, high up in the sky, at that moment, i get on my knees and propose.......we get married there and then.....then we come back down as the happiest couple on earth and enjoy the remaining time at the manor.

now i have 362 days left as a married man to my beautiful wife to go. So, now what to do ey? well to be honest with you, theres not much i would really change or try and force to do, as im in the process of creating my dreams by setting up my brand "MODERN DAY JESTER" which is all about expressing, inspiring, creating, supporting mental health and being part of a family network. Ive recently launched a real life, music video series, called "WANDERING SOUL" which has taken me, ironically enough, just over 12 months to complete and i have enough footage for releasing an episode once a week on YouTube, for 6 months.

One of the main goals of my brand is to help others and setting up events and festivals for unsigned musicians and talents and creative and interactive / engaging workshops for people with mental health (as i have Adhd and Asperger syndrome) is something i am in the process of creating.

so, i would make sure that, i would plan a 12 hour festival, for all types of people on the day of my departure. I would make sure that i would release my series, in accordance with my departure, and play the last episode on a huge screen in front of everyone of my series one hour before (its half an hour long). Then i would perform for the last 20 minutes on an 1850s vintage, john broadwood grand piano (as piano is my soul) and for the last 10 minutes, i would say my thank yous and goodbyes and be able to leave filled with enlightenment, knowing that i have left my legacy, made a positive change to peoples life's and accomplished my dreams. #express #inspire #autism #mentalhealth #music #passion #create

I know some people who say every year this year will be the year they get married. Here we are in December and nothing. All they have to do is walk down to the court house and sign some paper work to make it legal. This is something they would be doing anyways regardless of the wedding or anything else they want.

It’s been six years I have no idea what they are waiting on! Sometimes you just got to go for it.

Very interesting! I like the fact that you went into so much detail with counting down the days and hours. It seems to must of us care more about nurturing family and relationships rather than partying it up on those last days.

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So @anomadsoul is trying to get ideas on how best to spend one year if that is all you had left. Funny as I have thought about this before lying in a hospital bed. Spending time on your own after a health scare does bring everything into focus. So what if this was true would you toss aside all the goodness in you and replace it with the all the badness you can find.
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The problem is if you have only one year to live and maybe it is some horrible disease you would have to act fast on my plan as you may not have the strength and energy to carry them all out. You may laugh where this story is going, but I don't joke about this stuff and people who know me would believe it.

One year to get your finances in a healthy position so your family is taken care for when you are not around is a tall order but it is possible. Obviously a change of career would help and some drastic changes with no morals. Getting your hands on the finances that you would need can not be done legally within a 12 month period so this needs to be fast tracked.

I just see it as you have nothing to lose by doing this as 12 months goes by very quickly and being depressed and morbid is going to help no one. I suggest a second opinion first before you put your master plan into action as rotting in jail for life that isn't one year would not be fun.

I know I would make a devious type of criminal with careful planning and there would be no regrets as you have nothing to lose. I wouldn't rob banks as you would have to rob plenty to get what you need quickly. No point in robbing banks in my part of the world as you could walk out with gazillions of Dollars and it is only worth $10 so I would target drug cartels and most likely end up in South America somewhere.

Trust me this is not something I have planned to do, but this would make the most sense and I wouldn't hesitate to do it either. Someone who is calculated and desperate could pull this off and have asked myself why no one hasn't done it yet. If you get shot in the process who cares as at least you died trying and don't have to wait 12 months.
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@anomadsoul said you would be healthy for exactly one year so no problems carrying this all out.

One or two decent jobs under your belt and you could live like a king for a year with no worries as you have come out of left field as you have no criminal records and are under the radar. I think this is better than robbing banks as you are already stealing from the criminals and no one would have the balls to do this normally.

I must admit certain things have crossed my path in the past, but I wasn't sick so would never get involved. I have been offered by certain people in the past to get involved with illegal shit and I just can't as that is not me. I don't have a crooked bone in my body and this is basically the opposite of me. I doubt whether I would do it ,but this thought has crossed my mind in the past and why it was fun to write and share.

I am no criminal, but if circumstances had to force me that way I wouldn't hesitate or would I. I honestly don't know the answer to this and it is a hard one. Luckily my business is doing well today and don't need to go to such extreme measures and I don't plan on dying any time soon.

For nearly three decades, now, I've fantasized about retiring from the world and seeking to become a mystic...

Sufi.png

In a sense, I have achieved a version of this fantasy, by devoting myself wholeheartedly to my art, at the expense of all else (steady job, practical considerations, etc...) Having published 7 books of poetry and prose, I've begun to be described as a spiritual writer and my writing as mystical.

But, in my heart, I know I'm not doing enough. Part of it, is because the seductions of the world are too great and, I do not live alone; I am married.

The other part is that I lack the discipline and, perhaps, the temperament to follow an organized religion--though I am, increasingly, drawn to the mystical branch of Islam, known as Sufism.

If, in fact, I had one year remaining, I should hope that the pressure to meet my maker, soon, would help me to redouble my efforts and clear the inner hurdles that prevent me from pursuing my longing.

Photography by a friend, Zakaria Wakram. You can see more of his art, here

Oh that's beautiful, my friend. The deepness of a contemplative lifestyle is certainly calling you, as the forest was always waiting for Buck in The call of the wild, of Jack London.

This is indeed very inspiring. I will see more of Z. Wakram... food for our souls.

Thank you, for your understanding, kindred spirit & happy discoveries (re: photography).

As Rumi put it: what you are seeking is also seeking you.

Just beginning this book, which I suspect might interest you cqvgsbfpnb.jpg

Oh it seems amazing. Thanks for the reference. I've read some interesting things about that in ARAS (The Archive for Research in Archetypal Symbolism), from a Jungian point of view, and I want to learn more.

Most of the people’s answer are going to be like, “we are gonna enjoy life to the fullest or do good deeds or travel or do the things that we never had the courage to do”.
As excellent as these choices may sound, none of them are really gonna matter as soon as the doctor gives you a very specific time that is in this case 365 days.
We can never know when we are going to die and that’s what makes our lives interesting. I am studying so hard and trying to gather skills so I can get a better job and have wonderful life in ten years. But if I know the future and I know that I am going to die on the day of my interview of that desired job, why would I do anything? I wouldn’t.
I know that death is coming. I know that I am going to die someday, I just don’t know which day it is. Once I know that, the only thing I am going to feel is scared. Once you hear that you are going to live only 365 days, you are not going to only count those future 365 days but you will also count all those past days that you have lived and you are gonna realize what a waste all that was. So, this sack of regret is gonna be so heavy that you are going to be overwhelmed by it for a while.
I can’t answer these question because these circumstances do not have any future. These are not events that I can relate to. I can answer easily what I will do if I am given a billion dollars or a chance to visit the past because they have outcomes. But it wouldn’t matter what I do in this case because its going to end with death.
So, I don’t know what I am going to do in this case because its not a regular event.
I might change a lot or might just decide to jump off a building because the waiting is too crucial for me, who knows?

Interesting question.

I doubt I'd change much from a relationship or people-interaction perspective. I'd stop working at my job and travel a lot more though, to see my family and gain some more experiences. I'd also wrap up my affairs sell guns and items that my wife might struggle to deal with herself when I'm gone. I wouldn't make it a sad year though, it would be the crowning glory of my life and a year those left behind would remember.

My ethos is design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default so I work hard at living the best life I can now rather than wait for some event to prompt me to do so.

Living like you're dying is a good policy to have I think, for we never know when we might die. Today, tomorrow, in a year...

You have similar point of my view for this interesting question - not changing much at all!
Spending time with family, don't waste time in job and make a holidays for better experience from our life is a great choice and I think many people should think about this, until they leave this world!
That's true that we never known that death will come to your doors, but getting that info will help us prepare for best days of our life even is those days will be not longer than one year!
Thanks for answer and I hope so that you will enjoy your life!

That's true that we never known that death will come to your doors, but getting that info will help us prepare for best days of our life even is those days will be not longer than one year!

But here's the thing...You are dying mate...Life doesn't go forever. What other motivation could a person need to have the best days of one's life, now. That's sort of the point in my previous comment. Many wait until they have some massive event to provide the impetus to live their best life...I don't get it. You, and everyone you know, will die, it's unavoidable...Best to simply understand it, then get on with living the best version of life now, each minuted, hour and day.

We're all different though I guess and this is just my opinion.

We are born to live and supposed to die, but only we decide how we should spent the time left. Many people forgot about that fact that we in the unknown future will die.
That's definetely true:

Many wait until they have some massive event to provide the impetus to live their best life...I don't get it. You, and everyone you know, will die, it's unavoidable

So then don't wait for any impuls, drawn from life and try to do things for which you don't had too much time.

So then don't wait for any impuls, drawn from life and try to do things for which you don't had too much time.

Yes, I think that was my point, but thanks for saying it in your own words.

Today, a year or ten, it is all the same for me. Live the best I can with what I have absilsvle and work toward increasing opportunity in case I live longer and for those who will.

Yep, that's the mentality to have.

I’ve seen it to many times someone past away and didn’t have their affairs in order so that is one of the first things I’d work on doing as well. Not to mention just taking stock in general of what I had and how much I can get for it. Bucket list items tend to cost a fair amount.

I'd change a bit if I know I was dying sooner than later. Don't have worry about saving for a future that you won't be around for.

Agreed. For me as a gun owner, I wouldn't want to leave my wife (a non-gun-licensed person) with that burden. Also I'd want her future life to be as stress free as possible so I'd make sure all my affairs were in order. As far as money, she gets all my superannuation etc. anyway but as far as other things...I'd want it sorted for her.

We both have legal wills already which is where it all starts.

Don't mean to pry (too much) but I see that this is the second time you mention guns and refer to yourself as a gun owner. What do you need them for and why is this an integral part of your life/personality?

I am a sporting shooter and cull feral animals on a farm so guns are required.

Ah, I see... Stay safe 🙏🏼


[My opinion is fucked up just like my mind so This post is +18 be carefull while reading.]

In my case I would change a lot, since now im depressed nerd sitting 24/7 at computer, my life is a complete joke. Probably most people would say like this:

"Its you're choice, u are the creator of your own life, world can change depends what u see, if u see yourself as a happy guy, u will be the one, if your mind is fucked up your life will be too"

-Its right. I can agree, but what if u can't control yourself? If u can't control your own mind? U want to do something but ur body won't. Its like you have handcuffs on you. Let's see u know you should go right, but u will still go left. You know the way to go but u still can't go there. How can we change then? How can we remove the handcuffs from our minds? I didn't found answer after 24 years of my life. I can just guess, that's why I think if I would have a warning that I am gonna die in 1 year or even my parents would die, maybe shock therapy would help? maybe I would change myself? I don't want my parents to die, I don't want to have only 1 year left to live, but I still think it would help. Maybe its the only way to change.

Thats the thing I would change:

  • I would like to find love, that is the thing I am missing and I can't deal with it.
    -Besides it I would betray my love probably, I would love to fuck all the kind of girls, polish, japanease, korean, italian, swedish,latina etc...
    -I would steal some money. (let's be honest I have one year of live, do I really want to spend it on working? i guess not, money is not a guaranteed happiness, I am living already 6 years without any money sitting at my parents house, but to have a 1 year of succesful live I think money would be necessery)
    -I would use this money to go into steroid cycle and build the body I allways wanted, now when I look into the mirror I want to die. I can't look at myself, I am so ugly.
    -I would use this money to go and meet my internet friends, in my city I have no friends, so I would love to meet my internet friends. I really love them and I am sad that they live so far.
    -I would also use this money to take a trip to Japan as I love Japanease culture. Probably I would go and fuck some Japanease bitches, cause I love japanease girls.
    -I would do drugs probably, alcohol, weed, amphetamine and extasy. Who cares? I am dying anyway so let's have best year of my live.
    -I would stop sitting at PC 24/7.I would travel around world , I would go to all the band concerts I like and do crazy things like drugs,girls.

So it looks like I would change myself into worse person that I am now. To get the things that needs time to get, I would need to use bad methods like stealing,drugs,steroids, just to speed up the process I would need years to reach.

I myself find it relaxing every year to grow a couple of plants out of containers. I grow peppers, tomatoes, herbs. Depending on how much space you have or don’t have something like parsley or equivalent is quite easy to grow and maintain.

It gives you a reason every day to get away from the computer since you would have to water whatever you were growing. Along with harvesting what you grew and getting the joy of consuming it.

Change does not have to be big to have a big impact. Sometimes you just need something to make each day a little special.

I appreciate the honesty in your post. But it seems that you will probably spend most of your last year in prison so your plans may backfire badly. Besides hurting others is never a good idea since they may be inclined to hurt you back.

Japan is a fun place, though.

This is completly true thought from you.
I hope so that someday we will meet together and we will spent some time together!
Steemit is only place, where we can find kind and true people.
You have specific needs and you are not shy to talk about them here in your [+18] comment!
Travel to Japan and meet these culture and pretty girls should be a really good experience.
Alcohol and drugs why not, when you will spent that year healthly, that will not broke you.
Maybe that is the event to change the mind and start living with new goals, which can be obtained, if you start from today changing your behavior!

One of the things that came to mind is: quit smoking. I wanted to do that for so long, but couldn't. But a few months ago I decided it's enough! And quit by just deciding this was it. Never looked back since. So that's one of the examples that I already did as I found it important. But there's still a lot to improve lol. Starting with a healthier diet, working on that, but admitting it's hard.

If I had exactly one more year to live, I'd make sure that that year was filled with traveling. Go to the places on the bucketlist (assuming funds were available lol). And there is something else I'd do regarding my two oldest children, but honestly not in the mood discussing that part as it's not the best moment for my own good.

I'd defo also make sure I'd try to make a few ideas a success during that year, as it's a now or never moment .. so if I could I'd just take a jump into the deep and go for it. If it fails, at least I can take that off my list...

Oof so many things, I may think about it some more and write a post about it one of these days.. :)

You made good decision with quit smoking, but sometimes information about short life are not connected with smoking. My dear uncle get pancreatic cancer and never smoked, it has started from shoulder pain and he start loosing their weight, then after that he lives in total maybe 14 months, but those months was really painful and he got only worse and worse. So getting 365 days with good form I think is a bless from God, which want tell you, now is the time to live your live with passion!

Sorry to hear about your uncle :(
I know more cases of people that never touched a cigarette and died from lung cancer anyway. I'm personally just glad that I was done with it (completely and strong enough to quit I mean, because I was done long before, but never able to actually quit).

I try to do that, and remind myself about it as well, but it's not always that easy. During the summer months things are going much smoother as my mind is much clearer. I can't bare the cold honestly as I have back problems and temperatures in our bedroom are as if you are outside.. Thankfully I know probably within a year we will move to another part of the world, so I have something to look forward to, which helps me a lot getting through this winter (last year I was super depressed from November until the first sun arrived)

I shall try to remember those words though, because these things are always a good reminder to things that are easily forgotten. Thank you!

Thanks for answer, appreciate it!

Likewise :)

Sorry about your uncle. Life can be really harsh. If I knew the exact day I'd die, it will be easier to bear than reality.

Yeah that sad, but we need to be stronger without people, which we love.
I bet that he would be really good with that option 365 days without pain and only joy with life!
So I think that deal is not that bad and can bring many good experience and things in life!

Very true. I feel really emotional right now.

Breaking a habit is a difficult thing to do and I know I struggle with my demon as well. You made the right choice to quit smoking and I'm glad your approach worked out for you. You're very resilient and strong

Oh, I know it's easier said than done. I see it looking at my bf, who was like how did you do that. He even left a cigarette on the fridge for me the whole week after I quit, assuming i'd need it. And here you can't enter a tabacco shop with a minor, so he assumed I'd be in stress otherwise lol. Never needed it. He quit smoking two weeks after and still says he craves for them quite often. He started vaping instead, for me that's just another habbit/addiction even though it's different than a cigarette, and I don't need a replacement.

I hope you will find a way too, and do it a the right time not at Jan 1st because everybody does that. You know many fail anyways hehe.. do it when you feel it's the time to quit. You can do it! I will cheer for you!

Thanks for the words of encouragement Nookie. I needed to hear that. The person I need to defeat now is myself.

It's funny, I've been on and off smoking for so long it didn't even crossed my mind to stop smoking when I thought what would I do if I had one year to live. But to be honest, I think I would still smoke, maybe even include some weed now and then, after all it's not like I'm getting out of this alive... in fact none of us is, and now that the long term diseases are off the list since I'm dying soon well, might as well smoke more xD but that decision is amazing from you, live your last year without addictions.

Do you have a bucket list? Or did this post just inspired you to make one?

That mindset of now or never has actually achieved a lot in terms of people fulfilling their dreams you know? Thinking that if they don't try now, they will lose their chance.

That's definitely a great idea, I think I might as well write a post about this topic myself! :)

Good luck on that topic about your kids and hopefully it will get solved soon.

I get that, because I also know the feeling of having a drink and a smoke in company. It felt normal to sit on a terrace and do that. But the past (at least for a) year I only felt bummed that I needed it. Every time I smoked I had this horrible taste in my mouth, I felt shitty whenever I forgot to buy new ones and always thought about having enough cigarettes whenever going somewhere, because god forbid I'd run out. No more of that :)
So for me it would not add any value at this point, I mean I can handle a smoker, but I do think they smell like ashtrays quite often (and yes I was one of "they" lol)

I never liked smoking weed, but I discovered edibles last winter when someone gave me 2 they had left. I was in heaven, my pain completely vanished and I felt so happy. I can imagine creating my own candy shop of these whenever I had one year to live! Feeling happy and no pain is of course something appealing ...

I've postponed so many things, for several reasons, often out of my own control. But I decided to start just doing these things, or at least start preparation of making them happen next year. Not all of them but a few at least. And so I will. Even though I don't plan on dying at the end of 2020 lol.

About the bucket list, I've started writing one several times but never finished it, it's more like 10 different ones with all a few things on it. But I will write about this in the next days because as you can see I have plenty to chat about hehe.

Thank you for that <3

I managed to quit smoking a few years ago.
If I had a year left to live, I'd consider starting it again....at least cigars. Whiskey and cigars, in lounges with deep discussions.

Never got into cigars, but I would definitely start on some weed :)

I love that attitude, I guess you quit because of health reason, if thats not a reason anymore much as well go back to do what you enjoy

That and because the price was increased 40% suddenly by the government. Wouldn't need to save for retirement if I was gonna die in a year, so I would have no need for the extra cash.

Also, they started banning smoking in all indoor places and going outside in the rain or cold to smoke makes things really unenjoyable. So I would still need to find a nice lounge that isn't affected by the laws.

You could find all the nice lounges, go and smoke in every one of them and get kicked out. You might as well enjoy yourself ^_^

Hahaha. Spending my last year alive getting kicked out of cigar lounges. It's almost as bad as that guy who said he wants to go on a crime spree.

Life live without consequences, what's not to like about that!!!! ^_^

Completely agree, but I want to minimize harm to others while doing so. I'd rather be admired and respected than dispised and feared.

Traveling would be on my list as well. I'd love to see Iceland and just areas covered in mountains and snow! Don't get any snow where I live and I miss the stuff.

If I find out, I'll not make wholesale or radical changes but I'll make conscious effort to be a better version of myself.
I have had an issue with procrastination for a long time. Realising I have limited time around will be playing in my mind regularly and I'll just do things faster and with more urgency than I do now.

I'm normally a reflective person, I spend up to 30 minutes at least daily reflecting on how my day went and doing careful introspection. In this moment, I often evaluate my choices and try to rationalise as well as accept shortcomings and flaws. I believe having limited time on Earth will lead to this feelings spiralling down in a frenzy of emotions; I would try my hardest to fix my insides and make peace with myself first and then others.

I will also alert my loved ones about my fate and comfort them the best I can. I've lost a loved one before and I remember how painful it was, the realisation that there will be a permanent void hits really hard. I will do the utmost to cushion the impending blow by living my life to the best of my ability. Spreading love and goodwill as much as I can.

Finally, I will make peace with God, if he exists. Science, technology and human advancements in other areas make you question the existence of a spiritual head of the universe but maybe its just me and my upbringing that influences this but I often feel an unexplainable void in my soul. I believe thats God's space and if its not there, then I will try to put it there.

There's a certain amount of guilt I feel right now. It is not that I don't want to do these things but just like everything in my life, I procrastinate. I hope the cold hands of death also postpones its visit. Thank you for letting me get this off my chest

@tipu curate
ehh tipu didn't work for comments

By the way thanks for you story and your time, which you spent to make this comment!

I'll probably spend a week feeling sorry for myself, why me?

During the next week I'll be pulling my spreadsheet together to see how much I can afford to blow in the year and still have enough left for hubby to live comfortably for the rest of his life - I may be dying but I still gotta be responsible

The following week I will be planning where I want to go for the next 9.75 months. There are so many places in the world where I want to go and see. Some have always been on my go to list, some revisit. Hopefully I can afford to spend these 9.75 months with a bit of luxury, it is going to be my last days after all. I'll do whatever I want to do during this period even if it means sitting down not doing anything and just be me. Anything that I've put off not doing, like train to run 5k probably won't be done either . There's a reason why I procrastinated all this time.

In month 11 I will go back to UK to see all my family and spend time with them. They are very special to me. They'll be pleased to know they don't have to arrange for my funeral.

In my final weeks I'm going back to Hong Kong. This is where my parents came from and I spent many many years here when I was younger. It's my second home.

Unless China sends the army in and kill all the protesters, I cannot see the Hong Kong protest ending within the year. If I'm going to die, I might as well make my death worth while to the cause. I don't know what I can or will do and what impact another life will have on the protest. It's not like no one has died or been found dead under suspicious circumstances already. Whatever I do, it has to help the Hong Kong protest.

This is the What part of the What radical decisions are you making?, I just haven't figured out the How part yet.

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