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RE: Not All Moms Are Equal
It is indeed hard to heal, and I have to credit the turnaround moment for myself was when I found out I was going to be a dad. I new I had to get my anger under control and get my shit together so he wouldn't be doomed to the same crap cycle. I am off to read your post now. Thanks for sharing, and understand why you left it at that. I had debated even writing this, as it touches on not only very personal experiences but raises the question of a solution. Sometimes it is difficult once you begin navigating in that grey area.
Yes my foster son is one of the most angry people I've ever met. He is a volcano ready to erupt. Concerns me just about every day. I was angry too, but stuffed it. Gradually it came out but was then I was pretty much aware of it so avoided hurting anyone.
Awareness is key. I have to imagine that in many ways your guidance has helped him set up the framework for such a thing. The fact he continues to gravitate back to you is a testament to his high esteem for you as a man. I hope one day he will learn to forgive. It is a lifetime process for many, and sometimes easier to let time erode the feelings as new experiences blow over the soul like sand in the desert.