Forced Opinion: Having Your Way Part II, Contributed by @Olawalium
In the previous post, we talked about those who try to have their way and I shared a little story about our football training session. You can catch up with it here
It was a training session, and we have a lot to learn as a team because there is no doubt, we were disjointed. We all want to show off with our skills and we play more individually than as a team. It is not good for us and the coach/referee noticed that.
He warned us few times during the training session that we shouldn’t assume he would blow the whistle just because we feel it should have been a foul, a throwing, or a free kick. Instead, we should just keep playing, so we can learn to put the team first and of course, learn discipline. He wants us to learn to listen to the whistle. He wants our ears to be on alert even as well as our body.
It was 2-2 and we have about 10 more minutes to play. Our player received a pass on a clear offside position, next to this complaining center half, rather than chase the defender or obstruct him, he stood, waiting for the referee to blow the offside, and he didn’t, intentionally, because he just warned us a few minutes ago.
In life, most of the time, we find ourselves where we are, and we repeat experiences most of the time because we fail to take to instructions. We cling on to what we feel is right. Life, most of the time, will never give you what you feel is right or what you deserve, but what you demand.
So, still, back to the story, he was visibly raging and even took off his bib, to leave the pitch while arguing insensibly with the coach/referee. Our score stood and that was how we won it. Even until we left, he was boiling inside. He wanted to be heard. He was definitely telling the coach by sticking to his “football rule” while failing life’s lesson, and the coach kept to him, by repeating the instructions he gave us. Those who won’t keep instructions will always fall prey. Instructions are guidelines that build our character because instructions will, most of the time, act on how we are and what we think. It is to keep us in check and learn.
Most people want to have their ways without learning. To learn keeps you humble and gives you valuable lessons that would be needed to get more out of life.
Forget all that you think you know and learn. Your opinion is only peculiar to you because we see things differently. Be open, live and learn. You will be so surprised where you will need these characters you have been building all along.
Thank you for your time.
Source: 1
My pen doesn’t bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.
Still me,
Olawalium; (Love’s chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor’s order.
This is brilliant brother I read what you wrote yesterday and I believe this is just too perfect continuation of it. We really have to learn and forget about a particular set of rules. What will needed most is the listen and pay attention particular person giving us instruction with that we don't have much to lose but a lot of benefit awaiting us. I could remember vividly back In the college days. We all know that exam rules started that no cheating but the man who is invigilating us said we should try and help one another but we should make noise that is this boy back then who believes that he can have his way all alone by himself, he later had less then everybody else in class.
It is always good to pay attention to the rules, I mean a lay down instrution giving to us to follow and It always yield positively. If not for training match the referee would have serve that team mate of yours a desirable yellow or red card because he is so resolute and do not want to follow a simple instructions laid down earlier. Keep the good work flowing man. We have to keep and showcase a good attitude if we are to make it more better in life. Your piece is always didactic.
I ALWAYS enjoy reading your comments. Thank you very much for this.
I have so many things to say as regards this post, but I will try to compress it to ensure the comment is not longer than the post. Smile
The highlighted statement from the post is the alpha and omega of the problem faced by humanity. Everything in life works by principle, what you think you know is not relevant if it is not guided by the principle. You can't break the principle and still expect the same result with those that keep to the principle... Never!
I have been telling a lot of people about this statement for a long time now, it doesn't matter what you already know, when you want to know about new thing, you have to learn it, you don't assume you know what you don't know..
The guy was fuming because of what he already knew about football, he don't want to accept the fact that the law has been adapted to suit the situation on ground, you can't break the law without the law breaking you back....
Myself as examples
The other time you posted about the challenges faced by Nigerian as bloggers, I tried to open up because I want to learn, thank God I asked, the reply I got from @communitycoin works wonder when I applied them. Now, I am beginning to have results more than I used to.
What of if I assume I know it all, I would still be where I used to be.
Thank you @olawalium and @communitycoin. I can't thank you guys enough.
The day we stop learning is the day we die. Learning continues irrespective of the age. This is why even as a country we keep experiencing the same problem because we don't learn. We see how outside world run their economy but we are stuck with our archaic ways of thinking. Our leaders travel outside the country and only copy the designs of a house they are abroad, and not the peace and quiet, the laws and orders, the abiding with traffic laws, etc.
Being open to learning is building capacity for more. Learning never stops. Everything is evolving. Life waits for no man.
Before, when you pass, two plays come together, now only one player does. Nothing should be rigid.
Thanks for your contribution. Much appreciated. Gracias amigo.
That's a good point, I'm sure your friend would still one to maintain the old law.... Smile
Gracias
We are used to him. Hahaha.
This reminds me of a part if the bible that says
Astray means:
One of the reasons i think people are force opinionated is because of ego, some people hate to loose so they never want to accept defeat, hence anything that obstructs their flow of desire is counted as a threat and so they have to act in defense even if it was the wrong action.
I knew a girl who constantly had fights with her close friends because she didnt just have a flair for having her way, but she must have her way and you must follow her along, she was 42 yesterday, she has not married. But Gods time is best. A lot of time we only limit our potentials when we find these characteristics within ourselves and do nothing about it, The first solution to a problem is acceptance, then constant effort and determination to battle it out
Thanks for these post, it has re-opened our eyes to some so called small things. I hope we all learn
Totally love this comment and the example you gave to back it up. Yes, ego, but one thing we should know is that, accepting instructions ans learning keeps us humble. Who has ego helped? Hahahaha.
Thank you for this piece. I am really sorry about your friend. I really hope she let go of her desire to be right ans accommodate more openness to learn. No one knows it all. Thanks a lot again.
I am aware that we have every right to our opinion. Opinions can be useful. They are expressions of our preferences.
Our preferences are backed in not only our experiences, but our ability to perceive and interpret the world around us. Our opinions are also expressions of our beliefs.
However, our opinion probably doesn’t matter, even when we think it does.
For example, My opinion is that walnuts are awful. Because I don’t like the taste. But my opinion about walnuts does not pull any authoritative power.
Everyone is allowed to develop their opinion over time. They can revise it when they learn new information that informs them better. But they can not push their opinions onto other people.
Deep lesson learned here.
I totally love this:
We can only revise our opinion when we open up to learn. Not liking walnut doesn't reduce the benefits of walnut. Love that example. Really powerful than it seem. Thanks a lot for this brother.
Gracias bro.
I always love the write up.
Yaaaay!. Glad to hear that bro.
Most of our opinions are created by words and formulas, much more than by reason. It is not necessary to always defend the same opinion because no one can prevent becoming more wise. Those who approve an opinion, call it opinion; but those who disapprove call it heresy.
It is not very difficult to attack the opinions of others, but to sustain one's own: because human reason is so weak to edify, as a formidable battering ram to destroy.
I really love this. Really.
Thank you for this. This is deep.
You see team work is one of the essential in success careers. One would walk faster if alone but one would walk farther in group, with your team. No one can escape the process of learning , some lessons are involuntary lessons taught by life and experiences. The strength of the bees are in togetherness, the fire ants can cross a river sticking together. There’s great energy in togetherness, sharing and learning together. Some rules shouldn’t be limitations
Absolutely correct. No one can skip the process of learning. Nobody knows it all. Being open to learning keeps us humble.
Thank you so much brother.
Rules of the game are actually one of those things that keep the game alive, literally and figuratively :-)
As you said that not learning to abide by them would lead to failure in a lot of goals. As I was reading, I also found that not abiding by them wouldn't allow you to enjoy the spirit of the game either. Sure we can have a free for all but that would be little like anarchy and obviously no fun at all.
Even the rules of the game keep changing over time to accommodate more openness and freedom. Everything is about evolving and discipline is key.
You are right, not abiding by them wouldn't allow us enjoy the spirit of the game too.
Thanks a lot for this. Good one.
Glad you like it :-)
Extremely beautiful....
Speaks volumes.
The truth is, learning is never enough.
Sometimes, we need to unlearn what we've learned or relearn what we've previously learnt too....to gain proper insight.
Thanks for sharing this wonderful piece.....
Yes darling, we need to learn, unlearn and relearn. Every thing is evolving, and our thinking should as well. Thanks dear. Really appreciate this.
When it comes to instructions, we should heed it no matter how big you are or how rich you are cos without instructions people behave anyhow they like but where ever instructions exist, there will be discipline and penalties
He off the bib and walk out of the training ground,does that stop you from ending the train?
Which Means he's the only fool among you
This story is a lesson for us all. We should always humble ourselves and learn from others.
Exactly.