ULOG - A Firstborn Son
Hey, my name is @SumatraNate. I am a firstborn son. This is my story.
Birth Order
Isn't it funny how birth order helps define who we are? I am a classic first born.
I wanted my parents to be proud of me in everything I did. I leaned towards academics, so I worked hard to earn A's on my report card. I longed to hear the words, "We are proud of you."
I wanted clearly defined boundaries. I wanted to know other peoples' expectations so that I would strive towards meetings those expectations. I liked rules. I followed rules. I was a "good kid" , not a rebel.
Gender
I felt that dad was harder on me than my younger sister, but I have learned that is what happens to firstborn sons. One's gender defines cultural and familial expectations. It helps define how people look at you, judge your value, judge and your future potential.
I embrace my masculinity. I feel that I am a good husband and a father because of what my Dad taught me, but I wish that growing up I would have been more interested in cars, hunting, and other activities that dads and sons do together. I wish that despite my disinterest my Dad would have tried to harder to teach me those things.
Not Much Has Changed
At my core, I am still very much the same person I was when I was a child. Granted, I have more knowledge and experience, but the core of who I am has not changed that much.
- I still want to excel. I still appreciate hearing, "We are proud of you." I appreciate kind, affirming words and gentle, constructive criticism. Both push me forward and aid in my personal development and growth.
- I still like knowing where the boundary walls are placed. But I have started pressing on those walls more than ever before. I will still obey the rules, but I want to test to see if there is flexibility in those rules.
Final Thoughts
To know my story, you have to learn a little bit about me and what makes me tick. I appreciate you stopping by. And I am grateful for the chance to keep sharing my story.
@SumatraNate
Hi my friend @sumatranate, how are you, just came back online again. Miss you for sure
You have been very busy, right? I am doing ok. My family is sick today, but God is good.
I came to your post because you were featured by @cicisajain the weekly Pay it Forward Curation Contest I am one of the judges
@wolfhart, thanks for stopping by. It was an honor to be featured by @cicisaja. I lived in Indonesia for more than 10 years. Her post has allowed me to meet several more members of the Indonesian Steem community.
Thanks for the work you do to promote building relationships and encouraging others. Blessings!
Hi @sumatranate! I am one of the judges as well :) What an awesome post; it's great getting to know more about you. Thanks for sharing!
Nice to meet you @lynncoyle1. Thanks for stopping by and for the kinds words.
You are most welcome @sumatranate! Pleasure to meet you too :)
Indonesia has a great community there. they also have a great witness who supports that community which is @paulag . She also has an engagement league you should check into
I recently stumbled onto @paulag's blog. Thanks for letting me know about the engagement league she set up. I will check it out.
Senang sekali bisa membaca sekilas cerita tentang anda @sumatranate. Teruslah berkarya
Saya ketemu postingan ini melalui @cicisaja di kontes Pay It Forward, tapi sebelumnya saya sudah sering melihat interaksi anda dengan @el-nailul juga di postingannya. Saya juga anak pertama Ayah Saya tetapi sebenarnya anak ke 6 ibu saya, dan Ayah selalu mendidik anak pertamanya lebih keras dari siapapun, sebab dia ingin kita menjadi penggantinya mengurus keluarga nanti, meskipun adik perempuan selalu menjadi anak favoritnya, tapi seorang ayah selalu menyayangi anak pertamanya.
Terima kasih sudah berbagi cerita ini, senang rasanya bisa mengenal orang asing yang bisa berbahasa Indonesia.
Aku senang sekali @dipoabasch membaca postingku. Dan saya sangat dikerkati karena ketemu @el-nailul di komunitas Steemit.
Saya sangat setuju dengan komennya. Ayah lebih keras sama anak pertama, khususnya anak laki-laki.
Saya tinggal di Indonesia lebih daripada 10 tahun, tapi sekarang saya tingggal in AS sama keluarga ku. Kelurgaku sangat rindu Indonesia. Trims!
Semoga bisa kembali lagi ke Indonesia, segera. Apa yang paling dirindukan dari Indonesia @sumatranate, apakah ada relatives juga di Indonesia?
Yang paling dirindukan adalah sahabat-sahabatnya. Kami menjalin hunbungan yang baik sama baynak orang. Dan makanan juga - seperti sate, rendang, dan mei ayam.
Tidak ada relatives di Indonesia.
Semoga suatu saat bisa kembali dan berjumpa dgn sahabat2, waah.. Saya dengan senang hati akan traktir makan mie ayam sampai puas kalau Kamu datang ke Jakarta, kabari saya yaa...👋
I'm also the first born - though I'm a daughter.
I understand the expectations thing - and I really let my parents down in many ways - didn't succeed the way they wanted me to.
But I'm the one that gave them grandchildren!
You are not alone. We all let people down.
Congrats on giving your parents grandchildren. My wife and I have 5 princesses. I gave my parents a lot of grandchildren as well :)
Hello, I found your post from a post by @cicisaja for the Pay it forward curation contest.
I will be honest, I never put much stock in the birth order idea, although I know many who are. My mom is friends with Kevin Leman who has written on the subject. I think part of my discounting of the idea comes from my parents divorced and remarried when I was young and I fell into a different order in each new respective household.
I noticed that genders are usually handled differently, as my older sister was given so much rope that was never given to me or my brothers. I think by the time she was 10 she owned more clothes than I have in a half century of life, lol.
Hey @praticalthought! Thanks for stopping by. I have met many new people because of @cicisaja's post.
My wife had a similar experience. She was her mother's third child, but her father's first. She exhibits a mix of characteristics. Birth order is not an "exact science" for me, but it is intriguing how certain patterns often emerge.
Thanks for leaving a comment. Look forward to connecting with you more in the future.
Hi I came over because @cicisaja has featured you in her #payitforward post. I also am a typical first born. I agree it makes us very driven. It really is funny how that works.
Thanks for stopping by. I was honored that @cicisaja featured me in her post. Firstborns are driven and that can be a good thing, but sometimes we need to learn how to slow down (or even stop) and appreciate life.
That's for sure. Silly me keeps thinking extra time just means I can do more lol
Mother and father are everything. Because he gives birth to us. And we give everything to live.
Now that I am a father I am focusing on my family. I still want to honor and respect my mother and father. I am grateful that they raised me to be prepared for this part of my life.
saya yakin keluarga anda pasti sangat bangga dengan anda @sumatranate, tetaplah semangat
This post was shared in the Curation Collective Discord community for curators, and upvoted and resteemed by the @c-squared community account after manual review.