"I am a total wreck after finding out that my girlfriend cheated on me. How can I recover myself?"
Excerpt: The immediate relief for an emotional pain or trauma is to focus the attention in the now moment. Simply to stop the mind chatter. This method brings an ease to the mind and quickly to the body. With persistent, the energetic field is being cleansed and a balance is regained. Many people, in times of emotional stress, resort to alcohol, drugs or food. And why? because those methods halt the thinking process and bring them immediate relief. But then again, with some willpower, you can dismiss your thoughts and avoid the refuge of those external substances, which are no help for the long run.
Hi David,
I feel like crying. I have just discovered that the girl I was in love with has cheated on me. We had a long-distance relationship and although we have hardly seen each other in the past year I trusted her and I was sure she was in love with me as well. But today, after several days in which I didn't receive any email from her, she confessed that she has a new boyfriend. Oh, David, what shall I do now? You have no idea how much effort and time I invested in that relationship; how much energy I spent; what wonderful plans I weaved in my mind for us. Everything is collapsing now, and I feel miserably alone and hopeless. Right now I don't believe at all in love let alone True love. She lied to me the whole time! How could she do such a thing?
Sorry for rattling on. I guess I just wanted to spill out some feelings to ease my despair and sadness. Thank you for listening,
Joe
Credit: pixabay
Dear Joe,
I hear you and I do indeed know what you are going through. Before expressing in words the things that you surely know, I want you to stop what you are doing and relax. Just breathe.
Breath deeply several times and do it consciously, think of this act of breathing. It will relax your thoughts and will rebalance your Self for the next couple of minutes. Do it now. Then continue reading.
Breathe ....
Now, I want to remind you of some old wisdom.
Love is real no matter what you think or believe. Even if you look away, love is there and remains forever. Love, in its most physical and romantic meaning, is there for you. A wonderful spouse, your twin-flame, your beloved wife to live with you forever is there for you! This is real. This is a reality that you can create for yourself.
You know it. You feel it at the bottom of your heart, deep under the frustration and sadness of the mind. Do not lose faith!
In times of sadness and great emotional havoc, where your inner world goes hectic and you cannot see bright sunshine, do the following:
First - decide not to worry. Say to yourself, in the firmest possible way that you will not worry now; that you can always worry tomorrow but now you will not worry.
Second - take a few deep breaths and focus on the immediate reality that surrounds you. Bring your attention to what you see, hear, feel and taste (if you eat something). Be conscious of everything that happens around you and if possible focus on vitality and only pleasant things. But make sure you focus on the now.
Third and last - know in your mind that the best possible outcome will occur. Be fully convinced that you will find your True Love; that you will have a wonderful spouse as you have always dreamt of; that life will surprise you in the best possible ways. Have high expectations for the future and know that all happens for your highest good. Yes, including this break-up.
The girl left you and that created a trauma for reasons that may be unknown to you. But yet they are valid reasons. It's not that you did something wrong, or you are not a good spouse, or she was lying the whole time. No. The main reason is your own path in life. A wiser part of you, the Master self, knows that a relationship with that girl, right now, would impede your progress. And so, a situation in which you are being emotionally torn was created. Now that you were startled you can carry on with the plan you have set for your self in this lifetime.
Joe, the universe supports you. Do the above exercises I gave you. They will ease your immediate pain. Forget about the past, forget about the girl. Do these exercises and follow your instincts. You will be surprised by the outcomes.
You are never alone
I believe most of us were in Joe’s shoes. I actualy was few times. I personally have never cheated while being in relationship. When I was a teenager, I met this girl. We fell in love. Definitely one of true loves. After a year and half I found out about her cheating on me. She actually told me herself. I was shocked, hurt, but respected her for telling me. It felt like she wanted both of us. First few days were devastating for me, but I moved on. I went out with my friends. We saw each other very often as friends, I missed her, but she knew I moved on. And that was the breaking point when she realized she made a mistake, she realized she still loved me, not this other guy. She came back and I gave her a second chance. We stayed together another two years, after we split up. My point is, if I didn’t move on that time, she probably wouldn’t realize making a mistake and would feel having an upper hand. I hope this makes sense.
Definitely makes sense and so true.
I loved this statement.
First off, kudos to @nomad-magus for being such a lovely soul, answering people's questions and fixing them up with such wise advice.
Secondly, to joe, I would love to share a bit of what I have done and gone through to help me move on from my previous heartbreak.
Firstly, I told myself this - I have done nothing wrong and I have tried my best to fix it up. IT'S NOT MY FAULT THAT THIS HAPPENED.
The last thing you want to do is to inflict pain on yourself by blaming yourself.
After that, once your heart stables down. It's time to pick yourself up by loving yourself.
How do you love yourself? you might ask.
Figure out what you like to do, what you like to eat, and simply experiment stuff.
Pick up hobbies, new interest and passion.
You will realize that while living your own life happily; someone out there who might have the similar interest/passion might fall in love with you.
Let's end off with this sentence, "relationship works best when positive meets positive."
It always ends badly when you are upset with yourself/life yet you enter a relationship.
I hope this help Joe & other broken souls out there!
With a Big Bear Hug,
Darryl
I loved the words for Joe, to feel deceived by someone to whom you offered your love, your time and your sincerity is terrible, but there is no evil that does not come for good, even if things can not see them at the moment, the best thing is to trust that everything will happen and better times will come, where you will surely laugh at everything that happened.... to stay busy is a good option, looking for activities that will keep you away from memories and circumstances will make time pass quickly, nothing better than that to heal.
I know many of us have passed this stage in our lovelife wherein we are in deep pain, a pain that we've thought would kill us, however, in time or shall I say someday those paim amd tears will be washed away and we will be with someone else, who will love us and accept us for who we are. Amd we will then find happiness with our inner-self. Thank you very much @nomad-magus!😊❤
Indeed 👍
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Fantastic job friend. i like your work on steemit. thanks for share this informative post.
Talk problems hurt because betrayed, instead I never experienced it. It is precisely the experience that is the terpahit experience I have ever experienced. However, from the experience that I get a lot of understanding and new science. I don't know for those of you who are having the same experience, are able to take their benefits or not. But the obvious considerations behind is always there.
From the time of heartache that, the existence of true friends who can make my unruly hat and give the meaning of a beautiful friendship. When remembered, only my true companions who present with care and give mental support. If the on, their crazy ideas in the face of "the traitor love" me when it would make me laugh myself. Of that, sometimes the best friend is everything because on the one hand the love they are more sincere than our true lover. And friends turned out to be always there when we really need it.
Thanks for this My teacher @nomad-magus