THIS JUST OUT ~ "I Got A PIG For My Birthday!!" ~ Original Photography, Original Discussion, But NOT Original Pig ~

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Too Bad Birthdays Only Come Around Once A Year

I recently celebrated a birthday. And my good buddy HH and I went out to celebrate the momentous occasion in style. First going out to eat, then topping it all off with some much-needed cake. And OH what a cake it was.

A Block of Chocolate Heaven On A Ceramic Plate

Now THIS was a piece of Birthday Cake. I can't remember the exact name, but it was a silky chocolate thing , dripping with a raspberry glaze topping. Rounded out with a professional chocolate drizzle on the side. This dessert was downright amazing. And a bit on the sweet side. I'd call it almost Palate-ly Smarmy. Couldn't eat it all at once. After about 17 fork-fulls, my teeth hurt in that really odd, very good way, and I'm pretty sure a couple of my less-than-necessary brain parts went loopy for a time. Oh, the Joy! But it WAS my birthday, so that's all A-OK. Somehow, eating a bag of lentils just doesn't give the same result, on a big holiday such as this. (I cooked up the lentils the NEXT day, to soak up the leftover, dizzying wack of goodness, still wandering around in my brain.)

Oh, those small pleasures of life. Like CAKE!

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But What About This Pig Business?

During our conversation over my silky dessert, the subject turned to things we would like to get for a birthday present. Besides awesome cake. And what came up on my end? A Pig.

I've always wanted a pet pig. They just LOOK like fun. Though I've been told there's much more to having one around the house, than one might think. They get rather large. And though they look all pink and cuddly, with that cute, curly tail and funky nose, there is a bunch more, hiding behind that pet/barnyard facade. Have you ever patted one, at the County Fair? Or other standard pig area? They are NOT all squishy and warm and fuzzy , like you might expect. They're actually quite solid. More like a huge, warm, hard, sometimes hairy, four-legged pink rock! I think you could punch a pig on the shoulder pretty good, like a younger brother, and they wouldn't even look up. Petting a big pig reminded me of rubbing a large, bristly balloon full of cement.

Yes, the pig-as-a-pet idea is a grand one, but not something I would enjoy curled up all night at the foot of my downy-blanketed Posturepedic. Maybe those little mini-pigs are different, but I think not. After all, they're still pigs. I'm pretty sure they would still feel like a warm, hard, sometimes hairy, four-legged pink rock. Just smaller.

All this being said, I think the IDEA of having a pet pig wandering around the house, will probably stay on that side of the conversation. An idea. And other dream-world replacements might have to do. Such as a Petit Pig.

Which brings us back to the birthday cake restaurant. And my birthday pig. This is a dessert-only restaurant. That's ALL they serve. Desserts. Very very very very decadent desserts. And is it ever POPULAR. Folks line up out the door and around into the parking lot at times, for the chance to pick up an evening-out or post-dinner treat. And once inside, you wander along an immense glass case, chock full of sugar-loaded pies, cakes, chocolates, cookies, French puddings, pastries, and other goodies of oddling delight. Once your selection is made (good luck), you wander all over the place to to try and find a seat, to finally eat it. Oh, the joy once more.

So...after finishing up as much of my choco-confectionery delight as possible, I ambled back through the sea of people, much like a salmon-fish going upstream against the flow, to see what else of interest was in the case. And wouldn't you know it, there was a whole PARADE of little pigs, with a For Sale sign attached. Petit Four Pigs. No, NOT four petite pigs, but Petit Four Pigs. I had to look the name up on the Interbox when I got home:

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Wikipedia:
Petit Four

"A petit four (plural: petits fours, also known as mignardises) is a small bite-sized confectionery or savoury appetizer. The name is French, petit four (French pronunciation: ​[pə.ti.fur]), meaning "small oven"."

Another site summed up our sweet little pigs thus:

...a wide array of morsels of a confectionery sort, that can be eaten in one or two bites. The 'small oven' part comes from the way they were usually cooked.

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What I Discovered

All the little pigs, lined up 'just so' in the glass case. Corral'd between the chocolate Bonbon Presents and a row of serious Crème brûlée. Sweet little pink pigs. Just hanging out, waiting for a birthday boy to take one home. So I did. My very own Petit Four Birthday Pig. Such excitement!

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Piggy In His New Travel Container

They put my new little pig in a 'take home' box, like the one's you get in a fancy restaurant, when you can't finish all your food. Though this was not an actual restaurant, and not all that fancy. And not really 'food' either'. But still similar.

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Enjoying His New Pig Digs

Petit Four Birthday Pig, shown here out and about at home. Wandering around on the photographic background cloth like he owns the place. Though if you really take a moment, he looks more like a Birthday Pig, perched on a giant Pacific Banana Slug chassis. (Always moving in reverse.) Yet still looks like he might 'bolt' under the refrigerator at any moment.

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What I Need Is A Pig Enclosure

For some reason the box had a nice diagram on the outside, that gave me a great idea. I need to make some sort of pen, to keep my new piglet friend from running off.

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Great Ideas Are Born, Or Found In The Discount Supermarket

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Can You Believe It?

The local grocery outlet recently had the deal of the century on butter. Two point two pounds, for only a DOLLAR. Can't beat THAT with a wooden spoon! And not only is it butter, it's butter PATS. Just like you get in the fancy restaurants. The one's that are so fun to slab into a hot dinner roll, then watch melt as you wait for the main course. And now, you can have them at HOME. No more of that stuffing the little cubes in your purse or dinner jacket pocket to save 12 cents, when the Maître d' isn't looking. You can have your pats wherever you want, whenever you want. Never saw THAT coming. And for only a DOLLAR.

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You Can Only Imagine How Excited I Was To See THIS

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My Own Personal Fort Knox

I'm Rich. Rich In Golden Bricks Of Butter

These things are gorgeous. And there's 100 of them! They remind me of little gold bars of butter. Or the mysterious beginning scene in the movie Pulp Fiction. They really GLOW, and show off their tiny, butter-ific beauty. I feel very fortunate, finding such a gorgeous bargain...so far beyond my wildest dairy dreams. Plus, they ended up being quite practical as well:

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This Little Piggy Went To Market, This Little Piggy Stayed At Home On The Butter Ranch

OK, back to the little Petit Four Pig.
This butter box gave me an idea. Just like laying small bricks in a wall, I could make a brick pen for Petit Piggy, out of GOLD. Nothing but the best for my Birthday Pig. I stacked the little ingot pats out on the counter, making a long corral for my new-found friend. It was pretty easy. And he seemed quite happy with the result. And hasn't tried to run off toward the fridge yet. But who WOULDN'T like this new home? Surrounded by Bovine Butter Bricks of Gold. Nothing but the best for you, little Petit Four Birthday Pig, nothing but the best.

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Now I've got a problem. I'm waaay too involved in all of this to actually EAT my new-found, pink porcine friend. Which is what he was originally intended FOR. Maybe I should make an uglier pen out of Popsicle sticks, or twigs and driveway stones from the yard. We'll see what happens next in that arena. [PFI]. For now, Petit Four Birthday Pig is happy as a normal, big fat porker in a mud puddle, in his new golden digs. Ah, the life of a Birthday Pig.

~ Finto ~

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Thanks for stopping in and viewing my new Birthday Pig. If you have any thoughts about getting small, edible birthday critters, or for that matter, REAL critters on your special day, eating out at dessert-only restaurant, chocolate silk cakes with professional drizzles, what it's like to pet a REAL pig, or anything else this post reminds you of, please feel free to comment away in the spaces below. I'd LOVE to hear from you.

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And go to @ddschteinn -- There's a whole lot more...

_{Posted: 02/20/2019 @ 15:36}

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Excerpts From Late-Night Conversations With A Mechanical Cat

Fact Number 122

More Stinky the Cat Classics from CatFacts of Yesteryear